Monday, December 9, 2013

How to survive the Holidays- Conflict, Grief, Recovery, Stress

Happy Holidays


As the Holidays roll around we think of joyous times, mistletoe, good food, and fun with family and friends. However, the holidays are also a time in which one may deal with conflict, grief, recovery, and stress.  How do we get through the holidays without going mad?  Here are some tips to keep in mind:

Conflict
Holiday parties are sure to be full of fun and family.  However, these tines can also come with drama. Unresolved issues have their way of rearing their ugly heads during these times.  It is important to keep things in perspective.

1.  If there is unresolved conflict with a friend or family member please note that the holiday party, whether at a home or a venue, is not the place to air out your grievances.
2.  You can be cordial and save your issues for a more appropriate time.  If you have not tried or had the opportunity to address the conflict prior to the event it is best left to be discussed at a more reasonable time. There is nothing worse than a gathering that ends in a shouting match.
3.  Likewise, these matters need not be circulated throughout the party i.e. ""you know what happened...."  Holiday gatherings are not the time, nor the place for gossip.

Grief
The holidays bring about times of grief for many.  Longing for a loved one that was lossed through death or separation is common place.  It is important to understand that sadness is a normal human emotion and that grief is the process through which we demonstrate such sadness and process a loss.

1.  If the loss is attributed to death- share pictures and stories of the loved one with friends and family.  Positive memories aid in the healing process.
2.  If the loss is due to separation such as a divorce understand that your children may be experiencing sadness as well.  Be open to allowing the children the opportunity to speak with the other parent and share some of the holiday time if safety is not an issue.  Remember that the separation is between the adults and not the children.
3.  If you are grieving the loss of a relationship, surround yourself with friends and family.  Don't isolate.  Make sure you do not "beat yourself up" about the breakup.  Now is not the time to place blame or look for faults, rather a time to self-evaluate and realign yourself with things that you want and that are important to your future.
4. Self-care is key!  Be good to yourself during these times.

Recovery
Many believe that relapse is undeniable for most during the holidays.  On the contrary, the holidays can be a time for renewal and many suffering from addiction find themselves making a step towards recovery through detoxification or entering treatment programs.
1. If you are currently using and want to stop it is important to enlist a support team, locate treatment options, seek medical attention, have a written plan.
2.  If you are in recovery it is important to know and understand your triggers (who, what, when, and why you drink or drug) and have a relapse prevention plan (who you will call or solicit for support, what you will do, when you will do it, where you will go, and why you want/need to stay clean if a trigger presents itself).
3.  If you are supporting a person in recovery it is important to know that the journey of recovery is theirs, a sense of normalcy may be difficult to find when the past has been littered with dysfunction, do not enable, ask the recovering person if they are comfortable with alcohol at the party prior to- but do not make them feel uncomfortable about their abstinence by highlighting it or their past during the party, ask the person if they would like to invite a recovering or otherwise supportive non-drinking friend, mocktails may not be appropriate depending on the stage of recovery the person is in.

Stress
During this time, stress is second nature.  Stress can be positive in that it allows us to meet deadlines or otherwise counteract a challenge.  Those of you that participated in Black Friday shopping experienced stress and I hope you got the reward you set out for!  The added holiday stress of any of the above topics or shopping, holiday meal preparations and arrangements can however be a bit much considering we deal with a certain amount of stress on a daily basis.  It is important to note the following;
1.  There is only one you- take care of yourself first so that you can take care of others.  Don't involve yourself in situations that will result in undue stress.
2.  There are only 24 hours in the day and 6-8 of them require you to sleep- understand your limits and boundaries.  Create a task list, optimize your time through time management, start early/ don't procrastinate, it's okay to say no.
3.  Solicit help- the holidays are a time of family and friends (a sentiment that has resounded throughout this post) elicit help, don't do it all alone and don't be afraid to pass the baton on some things- you make great macaroni & cheese and apple pies and wrap gifts to perfection, but sometimes you just can''t do it all! In the end, it is quality time that matters.

So as we string our lights, pull out the festive decorum, and hang the mistletoe- remember these things. Someone, if not you is dealing with some of these issues.  Be supportive and ask for support, care for yourself so that you can care for others.  I love this time of year, but often long for loved ones that have passed.  I cherish the memories they have left behind as I build new lasting memories with friends and family. I know that tomorrow is not promised so it is important to build on relationships, worry-less, and give more. 'Tis the season! and guess what....it will be around again next year so make each one count!
Winter fun for families in

Monday, November 25, 2013

Share Your #GivingTuesday #UNselfie Today!

Share Your #GivingTuesday #UNselfie Today!

#GivingTuesday is coming fast! Tell us: why are you giving? Take a photo with your answer and tag it with #GivingTuesday and #unselfie! Find great tips on posting and personalizing your #UNselfie in our #UNselfie Toolkit .


#GivingTuesday
#GivingTuesday

Monday, April 8, 2013

Visualize Your Future, Actualize Your Dreams


Picture it!!!!!  The dreams and aspirations you have set for yourself have come true, it here, its now, and you have accomplished all that you ever have wanted.

For many of us, including myself, this has not yet occurred.  However, we should be pretty darn close and ready to want and achieve more.  When in graduate school studying for my Master’s Degree, I had a professor who required the class to participate in what I now know as a Visual Goal Setting.  The task was simple- think of your goals: personal and professional and cut out pictures from magazines that depicts the goals.  This would serve as our 5 year plan.

I happily participated in the scavenger hunt, looking for pictures that creatively illustrated my goals.  Pictures of travel sights, family, friends, pets, a diploma, professional, and a scenic office view quickly filled my poster board.  I was excited and eager to complete the goals.  The poster traveled to Houston, TX with me when I relocated after graduate school.  I would take a fond glance at it every now and then.

"Shoot for the moon.  Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.”
~ Brian Littrell 

By the time 5 years had past I was well into my career and to my amazement had accomplished nearly everything on my Poster!   Subconsciously I was going through my list and checking goals off as I went.  As to the goal I had not completed during the specified time frame, a doctoral degree- I am still working at that however, I have completed additional post graduate work which has led to additional certifications and licensures (short term goals) en route to the doctoral degree and I remain on track towards this long-term goal.

So guess what?!!! I am creating another poster!!!  This will be another 5 year Poster which I plan to divide into three sections to address 1 year, 2 year, and 5 year goals.

Visualization is key……….what is the last food choice you went out of your way to get, car you dream of, hairstyle you dare to get?  Why do you think ads cost so much during the Superbowl and we tune in to watch and then purchase?  Why do you squirm when you see a bug on television and feel as though something is crawling on you moments later?  Why do we set serene screen savers on our computers?  Why?  Because we want what we see- we are visually stimulated!  Its simple….Visualize and you shall achieve.  Put your goals in front of you and you can see what you are running towards.

By adding a Visualization to your written goals………………….the sky is the limit……FLY!!!  I encourage you to take the time to illustrate your goals so that you may visualize your future and actualize your dreams!

Well Wishes……………Syreeta

Connect with me:  www.MBHConcepts.com (Website)
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Wednesday, February 20, 2013

But Its Only a Prescription

Prescription drug use is prevalent, on the rise, and killing our society.  Everyday I see individuals, brave one's at that, seeking help due to drug abuse.  Many of them are addicted to narcotics delivered by drug dealers, friends, stolen from their mothers' medicine cabinet, or prescribed to them by their very own doctor.  Drug addiction has a new face, the face of the stay at home mother, the neurotic aunt, and the kind co-worker dealing with arthritis.  Unfortunately we live in a world where it is better to "just get over it" and by doing so it mean to numb our feeling and numb all pain.  We must be productive and often times this leads to a world of disaster.

There has been great focus on the mental health of America due to the recent wake of tragedy that has occurred in such a short time frame.  Mental Health parity (as we Mental Health professionals know it) has been something that has been of utmost importance for years!  Not because of the tragedies of Newtown or Arizona and so many others (all very essential) but prior to these tragedies due to the basic necessity of care for Mental Health.  Why is it that my care "from the neck down" is not as important as the care I receive "from the neck up" (another mental health jargon).  It is so imperative that my mental health is in check just as much as my physical being if not more so, but yet Mental Health advocates have been fighting for this equality for a long time, years before this gun control issue resurfaced.  In addition the importance of behavioral health in general which includes addiction medicine/ chemical dependency/ drug abuse (whatever suits your view) is so neglected. 

I was watching Dr. Drew Tuesday night and it was stated that people need to understand addiction as a disease much like diabetes or cancer.  Although as a professional I have made those statements in the past, I now see why society does not by in to that analogy.  Addiction is more so like obesity, yes the person has caused the disease by inflicting the indulgence/abuse on themselves, but now that they have it, it is so difficult to control, there is a psychological relationship, a physical withdrawal, and other medical issues that have compounded the situation....so now what!  You look at me crazy because I weigh 600 pounds/ I'm addicted to heroin....either way, I need help, I cant figure it out alone, and I should not be shunned.  I think this paints a clearer picture.

Anywho.....I added information from the National Institute of Health to articulate the prevalence of drug abuse and some facts you may have not been familiar with (test your knowledge by clicking the link below).  If you or a loved one needs help due to an addiction to prescription or other drugs, don't be afraid to ask for help.  Its worth saving a life!!!!!

Common Prescriptions Abused:
Xanax
Codeine
Oxycotin
Hydrocodone
Narcov
Vicodin
Percocets
Loritabs
Ambien
Naproxen

Test your Drug IQ:
http://drugfactsweek.drugabuse.gov/iqchallenge.php


Well wishes...............

Syreeta
Contact me at :
MBHConcepts@gmail.com

Tuesday, January 15, 2013

DYING TO BELONG.............



It is so sad that our youth are dying at their own hands and at the hands of others at an alarming rate.  Mental Health is so important.  There is a definite need for support systems, caring individuals who will take action when they see the ever present signs, and age/cultural specific services.  Even if it is a change in attitude, not seeing a person as much as one normally would have (isolation), or a change in behaviors...take action.  I believe that the celebrity youth are driving 100 miles per hour in the direction of self- destruction, and society sits back with sunglasses on as not to be obstructed by the glare of the sun when they crash.

The Entertainment Industry (music, media, film, and TV) all play a part in enabling this behavior.  Drugs, mental illness, occupational stress, and stardom collide and the wreckage is apparent.  Furthermore, youth in the community idolize these individuals and follow the path leading to destruction.  Prescription and illicit drug use is a commonality among youth.  There are so many kids on cocaine and heroin (not just smoking cigarettes and drinking a wine cooler- like the "rebels" of my era).  Oh no, these kids are on the heavy stuff and combining drugs.

I am sure there were many factors related to Freddy E's decision to take his own life and I will not say that this young man was doing drugs, as I do not know.  I will, however, say that teens face many issues including: mental illness, drug abuse (which compacts the mental illness), social issues (bullying, peer pressure), problems at home (CPS, abuse, poverty).  THEY ARE LITERALLY DYING TO BELONG.   We must save our youth, we don't need another tragedy to figure this out.

TIP:  Be a role model, be a mentor.
Seattle Rapper Freddy E Dead in Apparent SuicideSeattle Rapper Freddy E Dead in Apparent Suicide »
Seattle hip-hop artist Freddy E committed suicide on Saturday.

Article seen at:  http://www.billboard.com/column/the-juice/seattle-rapper-freddy-e-dead-in-apparent-1008074782.story?AWT2ygmPiHETRzYK.30#/column/the-juice/seattle-rapper-freddy-e-dead-in-apparent-1008074782.story

Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Happy New Year

The Empty Pickle Jar - simpletruths.com - The New Year has approached and I am sure each of us have already taken a running start...but let's be sure to remember what is important (family, self, friends). This short clip is a wonderful reminder. Subscribe to Simple Truths to receive free inspirational newsletters/ clips and search products. Thank you to my friend Lelita for sharing this site with me, its full of motivation!!! Click the link below to access the page.  Happy New Year!                                                                                                          The Empty Pickle Jar- SimpleTruths.com