Friday, February 20, 2015

Don't let someone else's imperfections become your insecurities....

Within any relationship there is bound to be some discord from time to time, but do you let another person's imperfections become your insecurities?

He/ She cheated on you:
Your mental record: "I must not be good enough, I'm fat, I don't look as good as he/she, I wasn't doing my part, no one will ever love me"  and on and on

Your boss yells at you in front of your colleagues:
Your mental record:  "I suck, I really should quite because I'm no good"

Your friend does not include you in a gathering:
Your mental record:  "I guess I'm not a good friend, I have been down and out lately, I'm too fat to hang out anyway"

Your children act out:
Your mental record:  "I'm worthless, I'm not a good parent"


Don't let someone else's imperfections become your insecurities.  Stop playing that recording in your mind, change the tune.  Many times we read way too much into things, over analyze.  Sometimes the other person forgot, is going through their own mess, or is simply a jerk.  Their character flaws do not have to feed into your self-esteem in a negative manner.

Think about it:  Identify what happened, state your feelings about it, and your expectations- then move on.  Again, your feelings about IT does not need to translate into negative feelings about YOU.  It doesn't start out as an easy process, but with anything that you becomes easier with time and practice, and since no one is perfect- you'll get a lot of practice.

Be well, be informed, find your momentum.............


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